Promise.

I have shared before about the importance of the song (more the meaning behind the song) "Blessed Be Your Name" in our lives.

It was sung at our wedding.

It was sung the first Sunday we went to church after we had the ectopic pregnancy.

It was sung (well, sort of sung, the words were on the back of the program and the musical track played) at Maelee's funeral.

It was sung, by my request, at church right after Eli's dedication when he was almost two weeks old.

And to my tearful surprise, it was also sung at church the day after we found out about this new baby.

It was such a great promise to me. A way the Lord gave me peace and understanding and hope at the very beginning of this child's journey. Was it a "this baby is going to live and you are going to have a cake walk pregnancy" audible promise from God? Nope. But it was a "I'm still God and still in control and completely trustworthy in even this" peace.

So I've tried to remember this often during the moments where I am freaking out or unnecessarily worrying. The truth is we don't know the outcome of this pregnancy. We hope it means bringing home an alive and healthy baby. There is no guarantee of that. But we choose to trust God. He is the same whether this baby lives or dies. He is still good and we will still choose to bless His Name. Oh it will be hard, hard, aching trust and we will be a fumbling, real mess if the outcome is not what we want. But the Lord has carried us through before and will again if that is the case.

His grace in grief has been one of the joys of following Him in this life on earth.

So when these two young, naive, sheltered, lovestruck North Dakotans stood and sang this song on that stage in Grand Forks almost eight years ago, we had no idea what suffering, wilderness, darkness and abundance would come (or what is yet to come).

Blessed Be Your Name
In the land that is plentiful
Where Your streams of abundance flow
Blessed be Your name

Blessed Be Your name
When I'm found in the desert place
Though I walk through the wilderness
Blessed Be Your name

Every blessing You pour out
I'll turn back to praise
When the darkness closes in, Lord
Still I will say

Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your glorious name

Blessed be Your name
When the sun's shining down on me
When the world's 'all as it should be'
Blessed be Your name

Blessed be Your name
On the road marked with suffering
Though there's pain in the offering
Blessed be Your name

Every blessing You pour out
I'll turn back to praise
When the darkness closes in, Lord
Still I will say

Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your glorious name

You give and take away
You give and take away
My heart will choose to say
Lord, blessed be Your name

Oh and this was sung on Sunday, April 7 at church too, right after Maelee's should-be third birthday. I hope the song never grows old so it's around a long time to challenge and comfort my soul.

-Heather